One stormy day it started to thunder whilst I lied on my comfy bed the thunder towerd upon my roof. The weather changed for the worst. SUDDENLY the rain was so bad that it made a hole in my bedrooms roof. I had to get a bucket and had to put it under the hole so it doesn’t wet the carpet. When my dad came home it had stopped raining and I said to my dad “PLEASE could you fix my bedrooms hole”. When he was finished fixing the hole in my bedroom my mum decided to take us to an Mexican restaraunt to eat mexican food.
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Hello Alisha!
That was some hole the rain made in the roof. I liked the way you built up the worsening storm. To make it even better you could read it out loud to yourself then you would see that you have slightly muddled the tenses. That is quite tricky to see as you are writing. Thank you so much for sharing your work on the 100WC!